i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
These Dirty People Haven’t Told Their SO About Their Kinky Fetish
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
This is Why People Stop Sex Halfway Through
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.