Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
I'm always down for nudity.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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