i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
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