i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize
