one might say we're banned from that church
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
he laminated a picture of his dick.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
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