i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
