I think I died a long time ago.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
