Say something about gay babies.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Randomize
