question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
