I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
