Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Green mimosas i think yes
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
