i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize
