lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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