we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
