if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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