i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
someone get that fucking seahorse.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize