i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
third nipple confirmed
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Randomize
