I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
