When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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