I hate all girls vehemently.
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
