I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
Are my feet made of real feet?
What drink are we having for lunch?
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
