Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
