Fuck appropriateness.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
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