Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
