I hope mine doesn't look like that
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
Randomize
