The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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