I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
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