a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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