I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Randomize