I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
