So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
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