Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
should my penis look like a turkey
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
I have already put on my inside pants.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
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