the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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