Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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