I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize