ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
17 year olds will be the death of me.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
