i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize
