im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
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