Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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