We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Randomize
