Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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