At least make sure they are 18
Why
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
Randomize
