Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
That accounts for only three of the penises
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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