My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
