oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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