That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Randomize
