we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
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