Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
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