dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
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