accomplished twins. life is a go
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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