she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
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